It finally came---the call I've been dreading. I knew that with two sons still in the military, the odds were that one of them would be called up during this troop surge.
Derek has been there once, and my memory of that time is dark and stressful. He probably handled it better than I did. A soldier always and all ways.
I am one very unhappy mother tonight. I want to be supportive and calm, a woman of strength. I do my best to portray that, but inside? Ah, inside it is a different story.
How do other mothers do this? You'd think I'd be good at it by now, with so many good-byes to my sons in my background. But it's never easy and each time is the first time all over again.
So here we go--a small space of peace and recovery from my father and mother's deaths, a couple of years to recuperate from Derek's last deployment, and a few months to adjust to our youngest son joining the Air Force and going to Germany, a couple of years for Derek to develop a civilian life.
I should have known it was too good to last.
No... this isn't right. I am angry about it. I have been since I heard the news. He has served his time, more than any other and here he goes again. This house of politicians has been 8 years of hell. I hope to goddess something changes soon.
ReplyDeleteGranny Sue...
ReplyDeleteYour son Jonathan is a friend of mine and we attend the same church. I found out about Derek leaving for Iraq when Jonathan asked our Pastor to pray for Derek's safety and for strength for the family. My heart went out to him and especially to you. You see, I am a Marine Mom twice over. Actually, make that thrice over. My son-in-law is now a Marine and will no doubt be deployed in the next few months. My sons were deployed to Iraq not long after the war began. My oldest son was deployed 3 times and my younger son was there for 13 months. I was extremely proud of them both when they enlisted right after Sept 11,
but I had no idea how painful the next four years would be. Your blog said "how do other mothers do this?" My answer to that is...you surround yourself with family and friends and continue to live your life. Delve yourself into the things that make you happy, obviously in your case it is writing and storytelling. With me, it was my music. I lead worship at our church. One piece of advice...keep the TV off. No news is good news.
You've been through this before and you can make it through again. It's never easy, as a mother, it's probably one of the hardest things we will ever do...watch our children leave. Whether its that first day of school, or off to war, we still worry and our hearts never cease aching for them. No doubt you will have plenty of love and support to see you through until that day comes when you can throw your arms around your son once again and say Welcome Home!
With much respect,
Tracy Meyer