Pages

Wednesday, July 15, 2020

Covid Journal, Day 121: Morning Thoughts

69 and clear.

These cool July mornings are such a blessing. While the day will heat up later and be in the 90's, the mornings are delightful, cool and crisp, perfect for al fresco breakfasts. Since mid-June almost all of our meals have been on the deck, and we have enjoyed it immensely. Food just tastes better outside, and coffee is definitely improved by fresh air. That's probably all in my mind, but I choose to believe it's true.

Add caption

Little Mister the hummingbird comes every morning to sit on his perch on the cherry tree, just a few feet from us. He seems to like the companionship. This little guy has returned for at least 5 years, and his routine of feeder protection continues. We will have to move one of the feeders just to thwart his greedy ways.

The flowers are struggling, as I said yesterday, but there are still some very pretty blooms coming on. The zinnias I started from seed have buds and should bloom soon, and the marigolds are doing well, both the ones in the planter and a few I put out in the flowerbed.

Here's a few photos of what's in bloom. I need to get back out with my camera and take some more.

Add caption

This lily is about 4 feet tall and needed a stake to hold it up.


Planted by the chipmunks!

I am cutting back the petunias a little to keep them from getting too leggy. They are doing well despite the heat, partly because they're in partial shade and partly because of Miracle Gro.

Fireweed bloom. I really like this wildling.

Live-Forever is almost ready to bloom. Last year the deer ate it, but this year I am prepared. See that whitish speck at the base of the plant? That's a piece of Irish Spring soap, a good deer repellant. We put it in various places, including around the vegetable gardens because one can never have too much deer repellant! Rabbits and other critters don't like it either. Good.
Yesterday I worked too hard and too long. It was midnight before I finished and got to bed. Today I intend to sit back a little, start a new book and recharge my batteries. I might make some cookies and finish up a couple more painting projects but won't be out in the gardens or getting into anything too strenuous. Sometimes I have to remind myself that I'm closing in on 70 and give myself some slack. We had planned to go to our Ravenswood booth today, but will go tomorrow instead.

It is difficult sometimes to not feel guilty about the comfort of my life. I was sitting on the deck with my coffee after breakfast, and feeling so...fortunate, and happy. Then unbidden, the thought of all those Americans who can't go to work, who have lost their healthcare because they can't work, who don't have gardens and access to free movement, who are worried about how they will pay for food, electricity and house payments--all those things flooded into my mind and I felt bad about being happy.

I feel helpless to do anything about the suffering of so many. All I can do is take care of us, and that feels selfish. Do you ever feel this way? Or are you one of those with overwhelming worries right now?

Copyright Susanna Holstein. All rights reserved. No Republication or Redistribution Allowed without attribution to Susanna Holstein.

5 comments:

  1. It's tough to not feel guilty in these trying times. All we can do is help when an opportunity arises and do our best.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That's true, Bill. I try to do kindnesses whenever I can, as a way o paying back. I suppose not being a bother and worry to others is one thing I can do.

      Delete
  2. It does feel selfish. I am like you, pretty comfortable, and grateful.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Hilary, I am glad to know I am not alone feeling this way. I went to your blog and read about your Chiari experience. Wow. You have earned the right to be comfortable after that.

      Delete
  3. When the virus first became apparent I had a feeling that I really ought to go back to work and help out, but then I realised that I'm getting near to the age when I'd be in some danger from the virus and I'm probably so out-of-touch with work that I'd probably be more of a hindrance than a help anyway. But I still feel a little bit guilty about it.

    ReplyDelete

Thank you for sharing your thoughts! Comments are moderated so may not appear immediately, but be assured that I read and enjoy each and every word you write, and will post them as quickly as possible.

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...