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Showing posts with label Memories. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Memories. Show all posts

Thursday, March 3, 2022

How I Didn't Learn to Play the Guitar

38 and cloudy, after a gorgeous day in the 50's yesterday with bright blue skies all day. Will fall into 20s and 30s tonight.

March is being true to form, unpredictable. Yesterday was a beautiful day; I finally got my lettuce planted after trying to get it done for a week or two. I used an old galvanized washtub this year, instead of doing this how we usually do--digging up and burning off a piece of ground, building a frame, etc. The tub is right here by the house, easy for me to get to and take care of. I guess it's a small nod to aging, or maybe just a smarter way to grow our early lettuce? I prefer the latter explanation, although it's true that it will be easier on me.

We have been so busy that I have had little time to write, and come evening I've been too tired to think. Not unusual for this time of year, is it. We had a major restock to do at our Marietta booth, after a month of very good sales there. We also had to re-do our window at Ravenswood, putting a big cabinet in place of the pie safe--we tried to change the window every 4-6 weeks to keep it fresh. Well, the big cabinet sold, so tomorrow we'll be lifting another big cabinet into its place. 

At home, we have been hard at work on furniture and other to get into our booths, as well as doing the springtime window-cleaning and curtain-washing chore. We've also been cleaning up outside, and last evening did a big tidy-up in the workroom because we could hardly get in the door, and we have some more things coming from an online auction at the end of this week. That means two trips to pick the stuff up and unload it. Sore muscles? You bet. Oddly, though, I am stronger now than when I retired, and it seems that many days I'm moving better than I did then too, so all this lugging and lifting is paying off.

This morning on Public Radio, they played a classical guitar piece that reminded me of something I hadn't thought about in years. When I was about a month away from having my 4th son, I decided to take guitar classes. I ordered a guitar from Sears for 29.95, a lot of money for us back then, and enrolled in an adult education class for 15.00 to learn to play. I was as big around as I was tall, so you can imagine how difficult it was for me to even see the frets on my guitar. On top of that, the instructor told me that what I had was a classical guitar, not a folk guitar. I knew so little about music or guitars that until that moment I had never heard of a classical guitar. The instructor, a young black man, was a big guy--not fat, just tall and built--but he took my guitar and played it as it should sound. Classical guitar, it turned out, was his thing, that and the blues--another new thing for me. 

As you can imagine, I didn't finish the class. I attended for the month of September but by October I was feeling pretty miserable and regretfully let it go. I never did try to learn to play again, something I regret to this day. At 22, I thought it would be a simple thing to learn, something I could do during those long last weeks of pregnancy. How wrong I was on all counts. 

But I am glad I was reminded of that class and that kind instructor today. I didn't learn to play but I learned about more kinds of music. My guitar stayed around for years until finally my sons tried to learn to play it and eventually broke it in a fight. A sad end to what my instructor said was a surprisingly nice-sounding instrument. Eventually one son learned to play a little, and as an adult bought a fine Martin guitar which he could sort of play. Now his daughter, our musician granddaughter Cassidy, has his beloved guitar in Nashville, where, I think it is still making music, and finally someone in the family actually learned to play well.



Copyright Susanna Holstein. All rights reserved. No Republication or Redistribution Allowed without attribution to Susanna Holstein.

Tuesday, November 16, 2021

Old Houses and November

34 this morning. Light rain overnight, but the sun is out now. We seem to be in a pattern of low 30's at night, upper 40's during the day.


Not much to talk about lately. I'm still getting rid of the remnants of my cold; it's taking a l-o-n-g time to be over. It's cold and damp outside, very November-ish. 

I've been wanting to get into some housecleaning, but haven't felt up to it. So I work on eBay, do simple things like laundry, sweeping, dishes, pricing things for the booths, and yesterday evening decided to sort through one of my desk drawers. It's always surprising to find what I've put in there: sterling silver spoons, old keys, prisms, pieces of broken jewelry, paper clips, lamp finials, pens, pads, calculators, bits of hardware, on and on. Some of it went to the trash, some I packed up for the booth, and the rest was organized a bit and put back. Although only I would know it's been tidied!

I sorted the top drawer of my dresser too, and it was much the same, but with prettier things like hankies and little boxes--and for some reason a few of the wood pegs that held together the last log cabin we took down. Those pegs really made me think about the early pioneers. Imagine having to not only hew the logs but also the pegs to hold it together. And gather or quarry stone for your fireplace, split and shape wood for doors, shelves, beds, tables, and anything else needed.

And that reminds me of an old house we looked at in the early 70's, near Front Royal, Virginia. We wanted to move to the country so badly we were looking at anything within our price range that had a little acreage. Even back then Front Royal was a little expensive for us. This old place had about 20 acres, mostly going to brush, a rutted road to the house which was in very poor condition. There was no running water, just a well out back where the outhouse was also located. No electricity either. And the floors were puncheon floors--the kind made by laying logs on the ground and smoothing the top of them so they would be fairly flat. There were boards nailed over this floor when we looked at it, but it was like walking on the deck of a rolling ship.

The lay of that land was lovely, gently sloping down to the highway. I think perhaps we missed out by not buying it, although in truth the house should probably have been torn down. At that time, the place was for sale for 20,000 dollars. But within 10 years, Interstate 66 was completed to Front Royal and property prices skyrocketed. It was probably worth a great deal more then, and by now it would be in the millions. We were young, had only a certain amount of money and little experience so it was likely for the best that we passed it up.

I often think of that old place, and the people who built and lived in it. What must the area have been like when they hewed those floors, cleared that land? And that old house, settling down into the place it was built, comfortably arranging its bones, full of memories, looking out at the world from its place on the hill.

Which led me to looking for poems about old houses in November. Very specific topic, right? And yet I did manage to find these, which I like very much.



Old Houses
Robert Cording

Year after year after year
I have come to love slowly

how old houses hold themselves—

before November’s drizzled rain
or the refreshing light of June—

as if they have all come to agree
that, in time, the days are no longer
a matter of suffering or rejoicing.

I have come to love
how they take on the color of rain or sun
as they go on keeping their vigil

without need of a sign, awaiting nothing

more than the birds that sing from the eaves,
the seizing cold that sounds the rafters.



--------------------------------------------

When the Year Grows Old
Edna St. Vincent Millay - 1892-1950

I cannot but remember
  When the year grows old—
October—November—
  How she disliked the cold!

She used to watch the swallows
  Go down across the sky,
And turn from the window
  With a little sharp sigh.

And often when the brown leaves
  Were brittle on the ground,
And the wind in the chimney
  Made a melancholy sound,

She had a look about her
  That I wish I could forget—
The look of a scared thing
  Sitting in a net!

Oh, beautiful at nightfall
  The soft spitting snow!
And beautiful the bare boughs
  Rubbing to and fro!

But the roaring of the fire,
  And the warmth of fur,
And the boiling of the kettle
  Were beautiful to her!

I cannot but remember
  When the year grows old—
October—November—
  How she disliked the cold!
----------------------------------------------------



November
Elizabeth Drew Stoddard

Much have I spoken of the faded leaf;
    Long have I listened to the wailing wind,
And watched it ploughing through the heavy clouds,
    For autumn charms my melancholy mind.
 
When autumn comes, the poets sing a dirge:
    The year must perish; all the flowers are dead;
The sheaves are gathered; and the mottled quail
    Runs in the stubble, but the lark has fled!
 
Still, autumn ushers in the Christmas cheer,
    The holly-berries and the ivy-tree:
They weave a chaplet for the Old Year’s bier,
    These waiting mourners do not sing for me!
 
I find sweet peace in depths of autumn woods,
    Where grow the ragged ferns and roughened moss;
The naked, silent trees have taught me this,—
    The loss of beauty is not always loss.

---------------------------------------------------------------

At day-close in November
Thomas Hardy

The ten hours’ light is abating,
And a late bird wings across,
Where the pines, like waltzers waiting,
Give their black heads a toss.
Beech leaves, that yellow the noontime,
Float past like specks in the eye;
I set every tree in my June time,
And now they obscure the sky.
And the children who ramble through here
Conceive that there never has been
A time when no tall trees grew here,
That none will in time be seen.

Copyright Susanna Holstein. All rights reserved. No Republication or Redistribution Allowed without attribution to Susanna Holstein.

Monday, September 20, 2021

Home Ec

68 this morning, overcast and still humid.

On a radio cooking show on NPR the other day, people were calling in with their memories from high school of Home Ec classes. Some of them were funny, others were grateful they'd had the class. The calls made me think back to 8th grade--which was in what was called "junior high" in my school days--and the one Home Ec class I took. 

Eighth grade was a miserable year for me; my memories are of dark, cloudy, lonely days. It was my first year of public school. My class at the Catholic school had all of 14 kids in it, and the whole school was well under 100 students. Marstellar Junior High, on the other hand, had hundreds of students, and I know only five or six of them as my Catholic schoolmates went off to different schools, depending on the district in which they lived. It was confusing to be changing classes, having several different teachers, and add to all that the fact that I was 13, had gotten chubby over the summer, and let's not even talk about hormones. I was about as unhappy as a girl could get when I walked into Home Ec class that year.

The first project in the class was to make an apron. Yes, an apron. Of course the class was all girls, and I suppose the teacher consider an apron a necessity for us if we were to cook in her class. We had to supply our own material. My fabric was cotton, with tiny pink flowers sprinkled with a few yellow buds.  We were to make half aprons, not the full bib type. 


Apron image from eBay. Don't I wish mine had come out half as pretty as this one.

Now I often sewed at home, by hand and by machine. So what was it about that class that made my poor apron so difficult? I'm not sure, but I think it was all the instructions to do this and then that, and the teacher looking over my shoulder all the time. The apron came out all right, which was a good thing because we were to wear them every day of that class. I actually kept that apron, and wore it, for years afterward.

Next up was making butterscotch pudding. I loved pudding---but butterscotch? Why not chocolate, I wondered? It wasn't all that easy either. I cooked all the time at home, because Mom wasn't doing so well. I think this was the year that Julie, baby number 13, arrived, so my next sister in age to me, Judy, and I were often cooking dinner for the whole family when we got home after school. But if we made pudding, we made it from a box. There wasn't any instant pudding back then, but I was fine with making the cooked kind.

This butterscotch pudding, however, had to be made from scratch in class. I remember that the process involved scorching the sugar--well, that was how mine went. I guess we were supposed to brown the sugar but mine went a little beyond that. It was tasty enough in the end, but sure seemed like a lot of trouble when there was Jello pudding mix in the stores. Now, I make pudding from scratch sometimes and it's no problem. But I've never attempted butterscotch again. Yuck. However, if you want to give it a try, click here for the New York Times recipe.

We had to make something called blancmange too, and baked custard. Maybe in those days these were the kinds of desserts that were popular. I don't know, but I did not enjoy making them. At all. I'd have far preferred making cakes. Or cookies. 

The biggest project in the class was wood refinishing. We were to bring in something from home for approval, and then complete the project at home, sort of as a homework assignment. That meant asking for Dad's help. He wasn't the most approachable person that year either; Mom was in bed a lot of the time, the house was a mess, there were all these kids, and he still had to go to work every day. I screwed up my courage one evening and went down to Dad's workshop to tell him about the project. "Hmmmm," he said. Dad loved woodworking and making things but refinishing wasn't something he did, that I can remember. We went up to the living room and he picked up a little Duncan Phyfe style end table. "Take this," he said. 

"How can I get it to school?" I asked. "I can't take it on the bus."

Online image of a table exactly like the one I refinished all those years ago.


The next day Dad came home early from work. When I got home from school, he met me at the car--we actually had a car that ran at that time, a rare thing in my childhood--and we took my table and a can of walnut wood to the school. I was mortified to walk through the halls with my Dad carrying the table, and now I have to wonder why. Was it because he was in work clothes? Was it because the table looked so shabby? Or was it just that I didn't ever want anyone to look at me that horrible year, and here we were looking so conspicuous.

The teacher was still in the classroom as she had promised, and she approved the table for my project. Back home we went. Dad took off the glass top and we found that the veneer under it was nice, although it had one small chipped area. 

Each evening, I went to the basement and worked on my table. The base turned out to be a beautiful walnut, and the top, when sanded, had the deep reddish-brown glow of mahogany. When it was finished, Dad brought it back to the school for the teacher's inspection. This time I didn't feel embarrassed. The table was a pretty little thing and I was proud of it. Dad and my teacher had a long conversation about woods and furniture, and my little table earned me an A.

Thankfully I didn't have to take another Home Ec class. In 10th grade I tried to sign up for Shop, the boy's equivalent, but the school counselor rejected my request, because girls weren't allowed in Shop class. Then I tried to sign up for Electricity class, but Shop was a prerequisite, so I was stumped there too. Today a girl can take either one. I am sure the young girls I know think nothing of the opportunities they have now that didn't exist for me, and you know, I'm glad of that. I'm glad that they can take these little things for granted now, things that required years of effort to change. They'll never know that. And that makes me feel that in some small ways we are slowly, slowly moving ahead. But boy do we still have a long way to go.

Copyright Susanna Holstein. All rights reserved. No Republication or Redistribution Allowed without attribution to Susanna Holstein.

Wednesday, September 16, 2020

Covid Journal, Day 180: A Plan, and Hurricane Memories

58 and clear this morning. Well, hazy actually. Lovely weather, low humidity, temps in the 70s. 

I picked a pretty bouquet this morning while working in the flowerbeds. A mix of garden and wildflowers, in a teapot I love that has no lid.




So, fighting back against the henhouse marauder. Whatever killed our baby chicks has not returned; Larry went over the coop carefully, and fixed a door that might have been a point of entry as a cunning raccoon could have opened it. I've got another plan that may or may not work:


A baby monitor. This one says it has a range of up to 1500 feet. It's probably no more than 200-300 feet to the chicken house, so maybe the monitor will work? What do you think?

Sending my prayers to any of you in the path of Hurricane Sally. Apparently she landed on the Alabama coast and although not a giant hurricane still caused much damage.

I've experience two hurricanes in my life. The first one I remember vividly, even though I was just a little over three years old. That was Hurricane Hazel, and to a child it was an exciting adventure. We were living in the little house my father had built in Centreville, Virginia, on a plot of land surrounded by tall pines. I remember the trees swaying and bending until they almost touched the ground, and huge hail--one of them filled my little hand. It was a wonder to me. Of course we were not allowed outside until the wind died down and we were in the "eye" of the storm. The term fascinated me; I kept peering up at the sky looking for a giant eye, but there was none to be seen.

We picked up the hail and sucked on it. It tasted a little salty, surprisingly. Inside, the electricity was off, of course, and my mother had the kerosene lamp lit. Dad wasn't home--he was an electrical lineman in those days and was probably at work when the storm hit in the middle of the day. We didn't have the kind of storm warnings in those days that we have now. I remember the sense of excitement in the air as neighbors came out and called to each other during the eye; I don't remember fear but I am sure my mother was doing her best not to show that she was frightened. Was my Granny visiting from England then? I'm not sure, but I think she might have been since she was with us for an extended visit at some point during this time period. If she was, she would certainly have contributed to keeping everyone calm, because that's just how she was.

Dad, during those early 1950's. I believe that when this photo was taken he was still working for Fones Electric Company. 



The second hurricane I remember was Hurricane Agnes. By the time it reached Northern Virginia I suppose it was a tropical storm, but it was violent, dumping many inches of rain and with strong winds that bent the huge oaks around my little home almost to the ground. I was married, with three little ones when this storm struck on my 21st birthday, June 21, 1972. My little house in Virginia was built about 1940 by a man who'd worked for the CCC. It was log although someone stuccoed over them on the outside, and it was as sturdy as can be, never moving in any wind. My husband was not home at the time of the storm, being away for his 2-week Air Force Reserve summer training. So my little boys and I hunkered down on the first floor of our house because I was afraid one of the big trees would crash on the roof. 

By morning, the power was out of course, and there was flooding everywhere. A dam had broken in one area and many homes were damaged. Our house was on a rise above the Occoquan River, and the river had risen many, many feet, covering the bridge and coming up the ravine behind our house to within about 100 feet of us. We were not in danger, as there was a steep incline, but I would never have dreamed of the river coming so far up. It was incredibly wide and raging. Somehow, by taking many back roads, my husband made it home a day later. The day after that we volunteered to help with flood cleanup while my mother watched our little boys. I would have gone back day after day but my mom said my first duty was to my little boys, and my husband worried about me since our youngest son was only a few weeks old and I was breastfeeding. But I will never forget the devastation I saw, and did not know then that when I moved to West Virginia I'd see similar sights many times. I learned from Hurricane Agnes to never live too close to water.


Copyright Susanna Holstein. All rights reserved. No Republication or Redistribution Allowed without attribution to Susanna Holstein.

Wednesday, July 17, 2019

More Old Photo Memories: Centreville

Going through old photos can be dangerous to your time, I find.

Another surprising photo turned up, and I don't know how long I've had it. I believe my father gave it to me when he and I were looking through his boxes of old pictures. That was a pleasant time, sitting at his kitchen table surrounded by black and white photos, and listening to him try to remember who the people were and what was going on.
I believe that's Judy on the teeter totter, with Joe on the other end; I am in fron of Pinkie Moran and Tom is seated on a swing beside me. Bill is the tall one in back, and I can't remember the name of the girl in front of him. Mickey Moran is on the swing, far right.

In this one, I am with my brothers Bill, Tom and Joe, my sister Judy, I think? and the Moran children. This was taken at our first house in Centreville, Virginia, on Beanblossom Road, probably around 1955. The Morans lived behind us--there was a path through the piney woods that led from our back yard to theirs. The Morans were all blonde-haired, well-tanned and rowdy. We loved to play with them although I think they made my mother nervous--and that's saying something as we weren't too tame ourselves.

One of the things we loved to do was roll on a barrel. We'd get an old metal drum and lay it on its side--30-gallon size was best, but we tried it on 55-gallon drums too--and stand on top of of it. Then by walking backwards or forwards on the rounded side we could roll the drum. It was awesome if there was a little slope as the drum would roll faster and we had to be fast with our feet to stay on top of it.

One day when the Morans were over we had the brilliant idea to get inside the drum and have someone stand on top rolling it. I was inside, as I recall; whoever it was on top started rolling and I started screaming, because I was tumbling all about inside, and it hurt! Another bright idea we had was to put a washtub on someone's head and beat on it with a hammer, like a drum. Tom or Joe, I think, had the drum on his head and Pinkie Moran was beating on it. That lasted only seconds!

Maybe I can see why Mom didn't really like us playing with the Morans after all.



Copyright Susanna Holstein. All rights reserved. No Republication or Redistribution Allowed without attribution to Susanna Holstein.

Tuesday, July 16, 2019

Coincidences: Birth, War and the Moon Landing

I was looking through my photos for one specific picture, taken on July 16, 1969, during the moon landing.

I was sitting in a rocking chair in my neighbor Ah How Ching's apartment, and I was nursing my firstborn, who was just 2 months old. I remember the dress I was wearing, a pale orange dropped waist cotton knit with small flowers sprinkled over it. I remember the small TV set that my friend and I watched the landing, and I remember her delight at watching me nurse my baby.

I never found that photo. I know it is here but where remains a mystery. Perhaps this winter I will finally get to the long-put-off job of sorting and organizing our boxes of pictures. Maybe.

What I did find was this blurry, worn Polaroid photo of my husband, also taken in 1969, and with it a letter he'd written home to his mother. The photo shows a young man--a boy really--trying to look like a tough soldier. He's filled out from the good grub the military fed its recruits, better chow than he'd ever had growing up in the coal camp. The thing the picture doesn't show is how scared he is, because he knows that very soon he will be shipping out to Vietnam.

The letter speaks longingly of home, wishing he was there and going hunting with his dad. He talked about calling soon and hoping his mother will be home when he calls, and that he wanted to talk to his father too, although he says, "I know he don't like to talk on the phone much." He also mentioned getting to come home soon for a visit. The visit never happened, as just three weeks after writing the leter he was on his way overseas.

Larry was a long way from West Virginia and the Olcott coal camp in 1969, and I was a long way from knowing he even existed. I was a happy new wife with a little baby, living in northern Virginia, with no idea that my first marriage would end or that I would ever live in West Virginia or meet my second husband there.

So while I was nursing my baby, watching the moon landing and comfortable that my husband was safely in the Air Force Reserve, Larry was somewhere in the jungles of Vietnam and wondering if he'd ever get out of there alive, and why he volunteered for the Marines in the first place.

One thing struck me when I read the letter: it was dated April 18, 1969. On that same day I was in the hospital, giving birth to my first child, who was born about 5 weeks early, and whose due date was actually May 25th--Larry's birthday. April 18th was also my English granny's birthday.

Today it is 50 years since the moon landing. My son is a strong 50-year-old man, and Larry and I have been married for 33 years. Such an odd weaving of destinies life can be.

Copyright Susanna Holstein. All rights reserved. No Republication or Redistribution Allowed without attribution to Susanna Holstein.

Monday, July 2, 2018

So Hot That...

Looks like we're in for a few scorching days with temperatures in the mid-90's. I am no fan of hot weather--I'd rather deal with cold and snow anytime. We will be sweltering for sure at the flea market this week. Yuck. We will bring our good old fan with us, lots of water in a cooler, Gatorade, etc. to help us stay hydrated. Basically girding our loins to deal with this.

It's funny how when we were young the heat didn't seem to be a big issue. Behind our house was a narrow tar-and-chip street, more like an alley, really, and when it would get this hot the asphalt would seem to melt, and send up bubbles of tar. My brothers and sisters and I would pop the bubbles with our shoes for fun. Mom would get so mad because of course it made a mess of our play shoes. I guess it's a good thing they were play shoes because new shoes were a rare commodity and good shoes were treated with care.

I remember one summer, the temperatures were regularly over 100. The tar bubbled up as usual and  we thought it would be fun to pop them when we were barefoot. NOT a good idea. We got burned pretty good; the tar pretty much cooked the skin right off and left raw places. Poor Mom. She was probably pregnant as she usually seemed to be in my childhood, and having to deal with tar-footed children was surely not something she needed or wanted to do.

Temperatures went over 100 almost every summer in my childhood. Northern Virginia's climate in summer is not ideal; often the humidity was unbearable and the heat would rise in shimmers from the ground. Although I am at roughly the same latitude where I live now, our weather is more temperate, with less humidity and rarely does it go above 90-95 degrees--although it does happen and this summer is on track to be one of the hottest on record.
The big old house where I grew up. It sure suffered a lot when we lived there. The girls' bedroom was the top right window.

We never went to a pool when I was young. Swimming was something that only happened during the annual pilgrimage to "the beach." It wasn't a real ocean beach, but a park on the Potomac River, a few miles from its convergence with Chesapeake Bay. The water was salty though, and there were often jellyfish when we went, usually July or early August. We were watchful of them, but even so someone almost always got stung. But those were glorious days or sun and sand and shells...and sunburn. Back then no one had even heard of sunscreen as far as I know. I got so badly burned one time I had blisters on my back and the doctor had to come to the house to see me. After that we wore t-shirts when we went to the beach and wore them all day.
This was taken after I was married and gone, probably about 1970. Some of my younger siblings in the water--Julie in the life vest, which I am sure was put on at Mom's insistence.

We had ways of staying cool at home, even without air conditioning. There was the water hose and squirt pistols and a big galvanized tub we'd fill and use for a splash pool. We had to be careful about how much water we used because it was city water and there was a bill to be paid. Sometimes we'd take a cool bath in the middle of the day and just lie down in our rooms with the curtains drawn and the fans on. The old house had high ceilings and it was quite close to the neighboring homes so it stayed fairly dark and cool most of the day.

One thing we often did was to make mint tea. We'd pick some spearmint from the herb garden, smash it with a wood pestle in the bottom of a glass with a little water, then strain it off and add sugar, water and ice, along with a fresh mint sprig. It was delicious and cooling, a special treat. We also made popsicles in ice cube trays, using Kool-aid for the mix and sticks we saved from year to year. Of course, if we made popsicles then there would be less ice--but there was never enough ice in the summer. Kool-Aid was a constant presence in our old fridge, the white ball pitcher often full of bright red sweetness.
Summertime! Shorts and peddle pushers and me, for some reason, in a dress.

When the sun finally began its descent, the yard would cool down enough to go back out to play, or to sit on the front porch swing and talk. Fireflies by the hundreds would begin flashing and we'd grab jars and try to catch them to make a nightlight for our bedroom. At bedtime, we'd move our beds so we could lay our pillows on the windowsills and catch the cool evening breezes as we slept.

Copyright Susanna Holstein. All rights reserved. No Republication or Redistribution Allowed without attribution to Susanna Holstein.

Monday, January 8, 2018

About This Photo

After writing my last post I looked more closely at this photo. There's a lot about that time in my life here.


Center left in the photo you can see a building. That was our tobacco barn. We were growing burley tobacco at the time, which has to be hung in a well-ventilated building to dry. It looks like the barn is empty so all the stripping was done by then and the tobacco taken to the auction. We had another barn full on land we were leasing then--tobacco takes a lot of space to dry and packing it in too tight could cause mold.

I believe this photo was taken in February of 1983, when my first husband was working away in Virginia. That winter the boys and I took care of the place, from getting in the firewood to stripping the tobacco and caring for the livestock. I was working full time on a different mail route that winter, and the boys (my four older sons) were 9, 10, 12 and 14. Jon, the twelve-year-old, built a horse shed by himself and we also built a small greenhouse, fenced in 23 acres, laid water lines to the barnlot and got the tobacco seedbed planted. The driveway, as you can see in the photo, was a right mess, deeply rutted so that sometimes we had to walk. The boys routinely walked a mile to the schoolbus anyway, and I often walked out to the mailbox which was also a mile away, so it wasn't much of a hardship to walk the driveway.

That's Jon's pony Goldberry in the photo, although I think by this time he'd sold her to Derek, and had another horse. The cow is either Honey or Daisy, the two Jerseys we were milking at the time. We also had a few head of beef cattle, chickens and depending on the time of year pigs and turkeys.

We had no electricity yet--that didn't come until 1989.

Would I go back to living like that? Yes, with the exception of the tobacco. And nowadays we are even better prepared for it than we were then, in many ways. Our income was unstable since my ex-husband worked construction (and wasn't union so even when he worked the pay wasn't great), and now we have a steady income, free gas, and a nice root cellar built by Larry my second hubby. The house is much nicer too--back then it was barely finished, a cabin really. So even if we took out the electricity and raised stock again, we would still be living a lot more comfortably than we were in those days.

Ah, memories!

Copyright Susanna Holstein. All rights reserved. No Republication or Redistribution Allowed without attribution to Susanna Holstein.

Wednesday, June 7, 2017

The Kitchen: Memories and Memories

A conversation with my husband today got me thinking about kitchens and the ones that left an impression on me.It is funny how one thing--in this case a large preserving kettle in an antique shop--will spur a memory and lead to remembering long-forgotten places, people, or things.
Me, first Christmas in this house, 1976. That's my
first Tappan stove in the background. The house
was nowhere near finished yet.

The kettle reminded me of the neighbor we called "Grandma" Compton. She wasn't my grandmother, of course. My grandmothers lived in England and New Orleans. But she suggested to my mother that we children call her that, even though to be honest she was a little frightening to us. She was, we thought, really old. Now I realize Grandma Compton was probably about the age I am now, possibly a few years older. Her deep, rich voice intimidated any child thinking of mischief, and her eyes didn't seem to miss a thing.

(This memory of Grandma Compton's kitchen is sharing space with some pics of the evolution of my kitchen here in this house I built with my first husband 40 years ago.)

 We didn't go to her house often; in fact, I can only remember being there twice. Once was with my mother for some kind of party event where pretty things were shown by a lady to a group of other ladies, and the pretties were passed around for everyone to see. I don't remember what the things were, but I remember trying to keep one of them until my mother's firm voice told me to pass it on.



About 1979, pretty tired from canning all summer and getting
ready for my parents' second visit. Things were a little more
finished, but no electricity yet.
The second visit is the one I remember most clearly. Grandma Compton had come up to our house with a large, steaming preserving kettle--the blue-black speckled kind--full of the most heavenly-smelling applesauce. In her booming voice she suggested my mother send me down to get more apples, as she had more of them than she could work up.

So a little bit later I was shyly knocking on the door of the big white Victorian house two doors down
from us and shaking a bit when a loud voice called "Come on in!" I made my way timidly through the dark hallway with its looming oak hall tree and wide stairs that disappeared in darkness above me. "Come in, come in!" the voice boomed again, and then I was in the kitchen.

About 1982. My parents were visiting for
the third time, bringing English family
with them. Still no electricity, and the Tappan
had given up and was replaced by this stove that
I came to hate.
And what a kitchen it was. A cast-iron, white porcelain sink with a high backsplash was on one wall, and another wall was covered by tall dark wood cabinets with beadboard doors at the bottom and glass doors at the top that reached all the way to the ceiling 12 feet above. Windows looked out to a sunroom and gardens beyond. The smell of spicy applesauce filled the room, wafting from steaming kettles on a large old-fashioned porcelain stove that stood on curving legs. A large aluminum kettle added its own heat to the room as it boiled away on another burner.

Grandma Compton's sharp eyes saw me and she said, "Hello there. You've come for the apples, I expect." I could only nod, my voice completely trapped in my throat."

She clumped over to the door that led to the back porch and lifted a brown bag full of apples, bringing it over to where I stood like a statue. "Will you help your mother with these?"

I nodded quickly and swallowed. "Yes ma'am," I squeaked.

She smiled. "Well then, get along home now." I scurried out of there and up the walk with the heavy bags, my feet seeming to grow wings.

Early 1986, when I was working fulltime as a security guard in
Charleston. That year I had my 5th son, and in 3 years I would be a
 sophomore in college, and we would finally have electricity.
I can still see that kitchen in my mind, with the crockery bowls on the shelves in the cabinet and Grandma Compton in her full apron and sturdy black lace-up shoes with their chunky one-inch heels. And I think now she would have liked it if I had stayed and talked, for she lived alone. I also think her kitchen is part of what inspired my love of vintage kitchen tools and crockery from the 1930's-1950's.

What about you? Is there a kitchen that stays vividly in your mind, one that brings back emotions and even smells when you think of it?

And another thought: Where does the word kitchen come from anyway? According to Wiktionary

My wood cookstove, which I finally sold
2 years ago.
"From Middle English kytchen, kichene, küchen, from Old English cyċen, cyċene (“kitchen; cooking; cuisine”), from Proto-Germanic *kukinǭ (“kitchen”), a borrowing from Vulgar Latin cucīna, from Latin coquīna (“kitchen; cuisine”), from coquō (“to cook”), from Proto-Indo-European *pekʷ- (“to cook, become ripe”). Germanic cognates include Saterland Frisian Köäkene (“kitchen”), West Frisian koken (“kitchen”), Dutch keuken (“kitchen”), German Low German Köken (“kitchen”), German Küche (“kitchen”), Danish køkken (“kitchen”). Romance cognates include French cuisine (borrowed into English cuisine), Italian cucina, and Spanish cocina. In other languages, the cognate term often refers both to the room and the type of cooking. In English, the distinction is generally made via the etymological twins kitchen (“room”) (of Germanic origin) and cuisine (“type of cooking”) (from French)."




My kitchen today, with another beloved Tappan range:



For a fascinating look at kitchens through the ages, check out these sites:

Wayfair's Kitchens Through the Ages.

This Old House's American Kitchens Through the Ages

If vintage stoves are your thing, this post on Old House Online is a fun browse.

I am looking forward to reading about your favorite kitchens in the comments!




Copyright Susanna Holstein. All rights reserved. No Republication or Redistribution Allowed without attribution to Susanna Holstein.

Wednesday, July 23, 2014

Porch Sitting

What is it about sitting on the porch? Just sitting there, watching the world go by? From my front porch, there's not much of the human world to see; Larry and I are usually the only two-legged creatures roaming around this hill, if you except the birds. There's a good plenty of feathered folk here, from the common robin to the colorful goldfinch and a mighty hawk that keeps regular patrol routes over our chicken yard.

Honestly, there's not a lot of excitement around here. Looking out from the porch we see pretty much the same thing every day: the dogs playing or sleeping, the cat prowling or sleeping, the vehicle parked in their usual places, the gardens and flowers and scattered tools that didn't get put away. There's plenty of trees to look at, and a nice patch of sky and we can usually hear a vehicle passing on the road--and if rain is coming we will often hear the highway, 4 miles or so away.

Still, the porch is where we like to be and we will be out there as late in the year as we can stand the cold, and as early in the morning as we can get up. We stop for coffee on the porch, eat lunch there, and often spend evenings in our rockers too, just looking out at the same ol' view we've looked at for the past many years. And the view does change, actually:

8 years ago, Hannah was only 8; now she's driving and a junior in high school, all of the vehicles in the photo are long gone, and the porch has been stained several times.

Haley was 10, I think; at this moment she is in basic training at Fort Leonard Wood, Missouri, as she begins her career in the Army National Guard.

In 2003, an ice storm created havoc with our view and took down some favorite trees,


but later in 2003 the mess was cleaned up and grandchildren came to make spoon puppets. Now these young ones are all out in the world, getting on with college, careers and life. Jared works in Morgantown, Allison is a high school senior and on her way to UT-Chattanooga with a full scholarship for volleyball, Cassie is in Nashville pursuing her songwriting career, and Kate is a psychology major in college.


The porch is still here, and Larry and I still sit out in our rockers, talking and talking and wondering how we have so much to say to each other even though we're together 24 hours a day. We watch the birds, pet the dogs, stare at the cats, discuss the gardens, make plans for the day if it's morning, or review what we did if it's evening. We listen to the trucks and four-wheelers invisible from our view and wonder who is going where and why. We hear the crunch of the mailman's tires, the drumming of a woodpecker and occasionally the roar of passing military aircraft. We watch the moon come up, the stars appear, the frost melt or the snow fall.

It might not be the best view in the world or the most exciting place to be, but it's our place, and that makes all the difference to me.


Copyright Susanna Holstein. All rights reserved. No Republication or Redistribution Allowed without attribution to Susanna Holstein.

Sunday, February 9, 2014

To Love and Valentine's Day

Isn't it a good thing that in the midst of this long cold winter, we can look forward to Valentine's Day? I must admit that at my house, we don't go overboard with this holiday. I don't put up decorations or make elaborate cakes and candies. What I do is smile a lot, and remember past Valentine's Days when I was younger.

I remember, for example, my first box of Valentine's chocolates, given to me in 10th grade by my first boyfriend. The box was yellow (my favorite color although I doubt he knew that) and satin-covered, and had a yellow plastic rose on top with a big yellow bow and a sprig of green plastic leaves. To have a whole box of chocolates to myself was unheard of--with 12 siblings everything was shared. But this box was mine and for once my parents did not demand that I share it. I kept that box for many years in my nightgown drawer, filled with letters and notes and small mementos of other special times and trinkets from other boyfriends. Where it went to I have no idea. Perhaps I left it in the trash when we moved to West Virginia, thinking I had outgrown such girlish things. Now, of course, I wish I still had it and could relive the memories it held.

Can you believe I found this box on etsy? It's for sale! I am so tempted to buy it but I will resist. Click here if you think it would be a nice addition to your Valentine's decorations.

I also remember an earlier time when I was learning to bake. My sister Judy and I made yellow cake cupcakes, and frosted them with chocolate icing, all made from scratch. On top of each cupcake we placed a conversation heart, picking them carefully to be sure they said nice things. These were for our family, I remember, and why I can recall those cupcakes today I don't know. Perhaps it was the first time we made them, or maybe because they just looked so pretty.

The school valentine exchange was always a time of stress. No one wanted to get fewer than anyone else in the class, and at the same time there were people I didn't want to give a valentine for fear they'd want to be my friend! Petty, childish, and yet so human--to want it all, but not want to give it all. My mother insisted that we give a valentine to every child in our class, so my meaner inclinations were overridden by her decree. The valentine from my current crush was scrutinized until the print was probably worn off as I'd try to find any hidden reference to how he might feel about me. Such heart flutters when the handwriting was recognized! I laugh now to think of all that excitement. It was fun, but I remember the hurt looks on some faces when their box contained only a few valentines. Kids can be mean, especially if their mothers don't teach them otherwise.

Photo from Craftjr crafts
School valentines were put into decorated shoeboxes. I wonder, do kids still do that? We usually made them at school as part of art class, cutting out red, pink and purple hearts and gluing them to a shoebox with a hole in the lid. Some luckier kids brought paper lace doilies from home but I don't remember ever having those. The doilies made the boxes much prettier, and yes, I was envious of those who had the pretty boxes. Emotions run fast and deep in children, no mistake about it, and not all of them are good feelings either.

At home we traded valentines with our brothers and sisters, usually putting them beside dinner plates at the table. Sometimes Mom had red heart lollipops for us, or little packs of redhots or conversation hearts.We always made valentines for Mom and Dad, laboring over wording and lettering. I found one I gave them in my mother's memory box after she passed away, a crooked heart with three words and my name. You can guess the words.

This week the stores are full to bursting with pink and red--flowers, balloons, cards, boxes of candy, toys, clothes, gift boxes of perfumes, and more. Desperate men will be rushing in on Friday to find something, anything to give to the one they love and hope that somehow they've hit on the right thing. The childhood stress grows up, doesn't it? My husband might remember to get a card or flowers, or he might forget what day it is and miss the holiday entirely. It's happened before. But after 28 years together, I'm pretty sure he loves me and I don't need a card or flowers to prove it.

Although chocolates might be nice...maybe I should just get him a box, and make him share!

Copyright Susanna Holstein. All rights reserved. No Republication or Redistribution Allowed without attribution to Susanna Holstein.

Tuesday, November 19, 2013

The Convent: Visiting My Past

I made my annual fruitcake-making pilgrimage over the weekend, but there was a side trip that was completely unplanned, a trip that took me back 55 years to my early elementary days and the nuns of the Benedictine order who taught our school.

I picked up my granddaughter Grace on my way across West Virginia so that she could be part of our annual bakefest. Grace is 15 and I hope that she and our other children and grandchildren might continue this tradition. First step is to have them be part of our day and learn to make the cakes. So Grace and I drove on to my sister Judy's, who lives not far from Grace actually, in eastern West Virginia. We spent the night there and drove together to Virginia Saturday morning.


It was on the way home that we made an unexpected detour. Our easiest route took us past the entrance to Linton Hall. This was a private military school for boys run by the Benedictines when I was a child, but our church (All Saints in Manassas, VA) decided to start a school, and the best available space was at the Benedictine convent. The nuns would be our teachers and the school would have 2 grades, kindergarten and first. The second year we had 2 grades again, this time first and second. I attended the first year (1957-58), and Judy attended first grade the next year (58-59).

In fall of 1959 the school moved to rented space at the National Guard armory and added 2 more grades so we had grades K-4. That year a new school was under construction and we moved in for the next school year. My class grew a little each year. We started with 7 students in 1957, but as the school grew to have 8 grades (K-7th), my class grew to 14 children at graduation. Each year we were doubled up in the classrooms, two grades to a class, so Judy and I were always in the same classroom together which suited us just fine. But Linton Hall was the place I always called to mind and the place that holds many memories. So as we were driving home and approaching the entrance to Linton Hall, I asked Grace, "Want to see where we went to school when we were little?"

It hasn't changed much. The piney woods where we had end of the year picnics is still there; the military school is now a private K-8th grade school but it is the same red brick building. The convent and chapel looked the same too. And down over the hill we saw the sign to a place we both recalled vividly--the grotto.


We pulled over and ventured down the path, memories flooding back as we walked. A gaggle of geese honked overhead, heading south on that chilly morning.


There was the wall of round stones, there the damp cave,


there the statue of Mary and the kneeling girl.




I did not remember it being a shrine to Our Lady of Lourdes, or the memorial plaque in the wall.

I thought there were more flowers but perhaps there are when the weather is warm. We were pleased to see that the shrine had been maintained; both of us remembered getting in trouble one day for sneaking down to the grotto during recess, and having to stand with our faces to the brick wall of the convent during the rest of recess. I can still feel the shame and misery of that! Other than that time, however, my memories of the nuns are of love and laughter, nothing like the grim tales we often hear about Catholic schools.

We thought we'd walk over to the chapel, a place I remember as hushed and sacred, filled with wood and brick and stained glass. But to get to the chapel we had to pass the convent, and there was a doorbell. Was there any possibility, we wondered, that one or two of the nuns still living who were our teachers?

"One way to find out," I said. And pressed the bell. No one came and we started to leave, but then a nun came down the hall and let us in. She didn't look like the nuns I remember with their stiff wimples and black habits. She was dressed in casual clothing, with short hair and really could have been anyone on the street.

"Yes," she said. "Sister Lawrence is still here. She's 88 now, you know. I'll see if she's up to visitors."

We looked at each other. Eighty-eight. She was probably in a wheelchair, I thought, or at least using a walker. She might have Alzheimer's; she might not even remember us. We read the history of the convent while we waited; I don't think I ever knew much about it before.
The door opened and a white-haired lady walked briskly toward us. She was trim and moved with ease, eyes alert behind her glasses. 

"So, you're the Connelly girls!" She remembered us with ease, and we spent a half hour with her, talking about our family, the school and our memories. She told us about her visit to Germany to meet her family; her parents were immigrants to the U.S. She described a bunch of roses they gave her on her arrival, and how the roses held well enough that she could bring them back with her on the plane.

I was sad to hear that Sister Ernestine and some of the other nuns who taught us passed away some time ago. My mother had urged me to go see them but whenever I was in Virginia my time seemed so crowded there was never an opportunity. I am very glad Judy and I took the time this weekend to go back--back in time, back in memory, back to when we were little girls. And I am very glad Grace was with us to share in those memories.


Copyright Susanna Holstein. All rights reserved. No Republication or Redistribution Allowed without attribution to Susanna Holstein.

Saturday, September 28, 2013

Remembering Tobacco

I recently mentioned that we used to grow tobacco here, and that reminded me of a post from several years ago that many of you might not have seen. Here it is, re-posted:

Imagine for a moment that you are on a West Virginia ridge on a perfect July morning. The sun has just risen, sending pink rays through morning mist. The ridge top basks in first warmth, while the hollows below are gray-dark and cool. Before you is a field of tall, lush plants, over six feet tall with leaves two feet long and almost a foot wide. The plants rustle in the soft morning breeze, and iridescent dewdrops glisten pinkly with reflected sunlight. Seashell-pink blossoms spike above the plants, a foam on the sea of undulating green. This is tobacco in its prime, proud and full of the promise of a good harvest.

Tobacco played an important role in the early development of our country. For the English settlers, it meant economic survival, providing a dependable cash crop. European demand assured a steady market, and the advent of slavery provided cheap labor for the handwork the plant required. Coming over the mountains from Virginia and Maryland, settlers found tobacco adapted easily to the rich virgin soil of cleared forestland and provided good cash income. Although some settlers in western Virginia owned slaves, the nature of the land suited small-farm enterprises, and most of those who farmed tobacco used family labor to grow and harvest their crops. When West Virginia became a state in its own right, tobacco farms were flourishing in many areas, providing a steady cash income to residents. As time passed and government subsidies supported the price of tobacco, growers found they could depend on a reasonable income for their efforts. Changing times forced many from their farms into other work, but tobacco was often continued as a good side income, and small plots continue to provide extra income to West Virginia’s rural growers today.

In 1981, my husband and I were considering a variety of cash crops that could be raised on our Jackson County farm. We sought the advice of our Ed Smolder, our county’s WVU Extension Agent, and his reply was quick: tobacco. Even though I was not initially in favor of the idea—tobacco smoke made me cough, reddened my eyes and gave me a sore throat—we eventually decided to give the crop a try. With the high return for a small plot of land and a local sales outlet at the tobacco market in Huntington, there was no argument that it was by far the best bet for a farm income. If we raised a reasonably good crop we could make enough money to pay our annual farm payment. For the next eight years we grew between one and three acres of burley tobacco, and I came to love those tall green plants and their heady aroma.

For the tobacco grower, the season starts early. One year’s crop has barely been sold at auction before the planning begins for the next crop. In February equipment and supplies are checked and the choice of variety to plant is made. There are many varieties from which to choose, differing in disease resistance, yield, drought resistance and growth characteristics. My favorite tobaccos were varieties called Number 17, a drought-resistant variety, and R7-11, a vigorous, high-yielding plant.

The real work for tobacco growers begins in March. While our neighbors were still huddled around their woodstoves, we were preparing our plant bed. One hundred feet long and twelve feet wide, the beds were plowed, piled four feet high with brush and scrap wood and burned off to kill the weeds and warm the soil. The burning could take all night; pots of coffee were brewed in the coals, hot dogs and marshmallows roasted, and one by one family members would drift off to bed, leaving a lone sentinel to watch the flames and contemplate life as the stars wheeled overhead.

Morning brought the sleepers back to the plant bed to rake out the ashes and till the soil to fine silt so that the tiny seeds could be scattered. A quarter of an ounce of seed could produce over 20, 000 plants. Fine as dust, they had to be spread evenly over the soil and firmed into the ground carefully for best results. Then the cover was pulled out of storage and spread over the bed, its edges weighted down with rocks to keep it from blowing away. The cover, as long and wide as the plant bed and made of woven fiberglass, protected the bed from frost and raised the soil temperature to encourage seed germination. After a good watering, the work crew finally headed off to bed for some well-earned rest, while the little seeds found their niches in the dark, warm soil.

In a few weeks, tiny pinpricks of green appeared and before long the bed was solidly green with impatient young plants pushing against the cover and each other for space and light. By May they were ready for the field, having attained a height of six to twelve inches. The cover was removed from the bed for a few days to let the plants “harden” as they became accustomed to direct sun and weather. The fields were already prepared—plowed, disked, fertilized, and cultivated to make the soil fine and receptive to the plants. On planting day, we were up at dawn, watering the plants heavily to make pulling them less traumatic on the roots; we squatted by the edge of the bed and pulled handfuls of plants to fill tubs for planting. The tubs were into the back of the truck with barrels of water, and truck, tractor, planter, and crew all headed to the field.

There was a sense of harmony and purpose at planting time. The work was steady and rhythmic, a union of man and machine, plant and soil. The click-swoosh of the planter as each plant was dropped, watered and covered, the rush of water into the tube as the machine pushed the plant into the ground, the slow pace of the tractor as it crawled along the long rows, the sun’s heat on necks and backs—until finally, the last click-swoosh signaled the drop of the final plant into the ground. The sunset and cooling air combined with the satisfaction of a good day’s work was enough, all that we needed from life at that moment. We would stand and look back over the field then head to the house as dusk settled around us. The comfort of walls, cushions, lamplight and soft chairs was luxury after the long day, and bedtime was early and appreciated. I felt a sense of continuity on planting days, a connection with generations of planters who had gone before me. I was where I needed to be, doing what I needed to do, and that was enough.

The growth of a tobacco plant is phenomenal. The six-to-twelve inch plants of May become imperial, six-foot giants by the end of July, with central stalks as big and sturdy as young tree trunks. As the blossoms open the field becomes a gardener’s fantasy, but the blooms are not allowed to remain for long. The flowers rob the plant of nutrients needed for the huge lower leaves, and it is these “lugs” that are the real crop the tobacco farmer is after. The plant must be “topped” by removing the upper flower stalk, and “suckered” to remove any growth in the leaf axils. Topping is done by hand, and the sticky tobacco juice creates black, tacky fingers in the heat of a July day. I did not like this part of tobacco growing, but I always saved a huge bouquet of the tobacco flowers. These would find their way into a vase on our dining table, a tribute to the green-and-pink glory of the field in full bloom.

Suckering had to be done throughout the month of August, as the plants ripened and the lower leaves continued to grow. By September, the cooling air and changing color of the leaves signaled the advent of harvest-time. The plants were no longer deep green—they were now golden yellow, a field of autumn sunshine. Full and heavy, they were ready for cutting and hanging in the drying barn to cure.

Harvest meant long days in the sun, bending to the rhythmic chop! of the machete or corn knife, and straightening to the swish! of falling plants. The plants were piled high on the wagon in golden mounds, then hauled to the barn and hung in tiers from sticks, one plant at a time. The process continued row after row, until the field was empty and the barn was full.
The sight of that full barn filled us with a sense of accomplishment. The barn seemed to glow with stored sunshine, and the strong tobacco aroma on damp mornings was a reminder of the hours of work that went into making the crop. As the fall days shortened and the woods began to burn with reds, oranges and yellows, the tobacco changed color too, from yellow to tan and finally to rich brown, the color of a fully cured leaf. By November the plants were ready for stripping and baling, the last step before the trip to the tobacco auction in Huntington.

Stripping is a weather-sensitive activity: the humidity must be just right to allow the dry leaves to be pulled from the stalks with minimal damage. Dark, cold, drizzly days when sane folks are stoking up the stove and finding a good book to read will find the tobacco grower in the barn, pulling and sorting the leaves according to color or “grade.” The leaves must be packed carefully, keeping them as intact as possible, all the while pressing them into compact bales weighing 90 to 130 pounds apiece. If the tobacco is stripped too wet, it will mold and lose much of its value. If baled too dry, it will shatter and potential earnings will turn to tobacco dust on the floor of the barn.

I loved stripping days. We’d take our camp stove to the barn and keep a pot of coffee boiling and a kettle of stew cooking as we worked. The odor of coffee and stew were overwhelmed by the strong tobacco smell. The coffee warmed our insides but not the outside as hours passed in the barn. Tier after tier emptied as we talked, sang, joked, and worked. Finally the last plant was taken down, the last leaf stripped, and the barn was empty again, the neat stacks of brown bales a fragrant memory of fire and rain, sweat and aching backs, morning dew and summer heat. Those bales were spring, summer and fall, packaged neatly and ready for sale.

The trip to the tobacco auction was always a cheerful one, for at the journey’s end was the reward for our year’s work. The auction house and tobacco warehouse in Huntington was a vast tobacco-filled cavern where growers, graders and buyers wander among the piles of brown bales, examining, comparing and evaluating. The tobacco was weighed in and ticketed with weight and our name, waiting for the graders to assign quality level.

The tobacco auction itself is a marvel of speed and efficiency. Two thousand pounds of tobacco sells in less than 20 seconds. The auctioneer’s rapid-fire delivery can be heard through the sound system in all corners. We watched carefully to see what tobacco similar in quality to our crop would bring. The price supports were guaranteed, but some years the price went above that minimum, so there was always the possibility of earning some unexpected money.

Even to practiced ears it was difficult to hear the final price per pound, and it was not until we looked at the tags on our bales that we would find out what we had earned that year. With calculators in hand, we would figure the total sale; the check itself seemed anticlimactic when we picked it up a few hours later. The trip home was leisurely as we reminisced over the past year and made plans for the next crop. We would usually find a quiet place for coffee and lunch, a small celebration of the completion of the year’s work.

The 1988 sale was different, however. Our conversation at lunch differed from those of past years. Instead of talking about what we would do in the coming year, we were questioning whether we would plant a crop at all. The increasing demands of my college classes, my husband’s job, and the decreasing availability of free labor as our sons grew up made tobacco growing an endeavor that strained our capabilities. Conscience pricked, too—should we continue to grow something proven to be so unhealthy? That autumn, I was unable to help with stripping because of breathing problems caused by the tobacco dust in the barn. My husband wanted to quit his smoking habit of twenty years; being around the plants and in the barn made quitting impossible for him. Reluctantly, we decided not to plant another crop.

So the 1988 crop was our last. The barn, although empty of tobacco for over twenty years, still smells of good burley when the weather is damp, and we go there sometimes just to be reminded of the good times and hard work of the past.

I miss growing tobacco. I miss it a lot. I miss burning the bed. I miss peeking under the bed cover for the first signs of green. I miss the planting and the fields of towering plants in their prime. I miss the satisfaction of the barn full of tobacco, and the excitement of the tobacco auction. It is a part of my life that is over, but the memories of those days will remain as golden in my mind as the harvest-ready plants, standing proud in the autumn sun.


Copyright Susanna Holstein. All rights reserved. No Republication or Redistribution Allowed without attribution to Susanna Holstein.
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